How do you talk to your child about sex without it being an embarrassing experience?

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How do you talk to your child about sex without it being an embarrassing experience?

Talking to a child about sex scares many parents who do not know how to conduct it and what to say. And this topic certainly can not be trivialized. So how to prepare for it, so that it is not an unpleasant experience for both parties?

Many parents are frightened at the very thought of having to talk to their children about their sexuality. Such topics are certainly embarrassing and often difficult for both parties. One thing is certain – you must not give up such conversations! The child should be aware of its body and what is happening to it.

Such conversations cannot take place “by chance”

In order for a conversation about sex not to be remembered by children and adults as something embarrassing and unpleasant, one should prepare for it. Do not just mention certain topics, or refrain from answering embarrassing questions by saying “you’ll find out one day”

It is a good idea to sit down for such a conversation when the parent and child have free time and nothing disturbs them. It’s a good idea to tell your child in advance that such a topic will be raised, so that he or she can prepare a list of questions bothering him or her. The parent should also remember something from the anatomy lesson, so that there is no situation that the answer to most of the questions asked is “I do not know”

Don’t get angry at the questions asked

Experts agree that you should not negate the questions and get angry with the child for asking them. Of course, it is worth to dose the amount of information and adjust it to the age of the child. After all, we are not going to show kamasutra to a toddler – let’s not get paranoid. Simple answers are often enough for small children, e.g. “where does your brother/sister come from? – “from mom’s belly, because parents love each other very much”. It turns out that with toddlers such answers are usually enough. It is different in the case of older children. Here it is necessary to give a slightly more extensive answer. If the child notices that his questions about sex make us angry – he will probably stop asking them, and that is not the point

When to talk to a child about sex and contraception?

There is no specific age at which you should start talking to your child about sex. It is worth starting from the earliest possible age, thanks to which it will not be a taboo subject, and the child will know that it does not have to expand its knowledge in this area, asking friends, or reading information available on the Internet. At the beginning, of course, the conversations should not be too in-depth and should concern, for example, love between two people, anatomical differences, etc. A child attending school should already be aware that the parents decide about the birth of the child and that procreation requires a woman and a man who can control it. Of course, as the child grows older, the knowledge transferred will be much more detailed. However, it is always good to talk a lot about feelings between two people, their partnership, love and respect

You can use different books

If you are afraid to talk to your child about sex and this topic keeps you awake at night, it is worth using many available publications on this subject, e.g. “Where children (don’t) come from”, “If the bocian doesn’t come, that is where children come from”, “A simple book about where children come from” or “Where children come from”. There are really a lot of such books, and many of them are written in very simple, pleasant (and sometimes funny) language. You can find a lot of useful advice in them and broaden your knowledge about sexuality.

Read also: Want your child to share your love of reading? We’ll give you tips on how to make it happen

Main Photo: Ketut Subiyanto/

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